It’s allowed to say NO and STOP unapologetically!

Last night my aunt sent me a video of my almost 3-year-old daughter trying to shoot her a video and she was not interested. The video starts with her complaining, “handisi kuda kutorwa picta…” (trans; I don’t want to be taken a picture). She was busy chasing a blue balloon and when she noticed that they were still filming her, she rushed and hid behind the curtain leaving her balloon still shouting, “handisi kuda kutorwa picta…” Within a few seconds, she came out of her hiding spot hoping that the videographer had given up. To her frustration, they had not given up. She took her balloon and went to hide by the side of the sofa now in tears. When she realised, they were not going to stop and everyone was laughing at her resilience, she rushed to attack the videographer. I could see the devastation in her eyes as she cried and hit Aunt telling her to stop. People around were laughing and asking her why she was not interested.

This hit me so hard, at what point do people really get to understand a NO? My daughter wasn’t interested, and she made it clear but to everyone else it was some sort of a joke. What I loved was she was brave enough to fight. She had to do whatever it takes to defend her choice. I hope she grows up that way, having the spirit of shielding herself. There are predators out there so the fighter in you needs to be kept alive, only to be used when need be. Of course, I don’t want her to develop violent traits. Everyone deserves to be heard.

I hope our society learns to respect other people’s choices. A no should be treated as such whether it feels silly or not. The fact that one is not interested in a particular thing they have to say it unapologetically. Our kids need to feel listened to so that they may also listen when we tell them to stop doing something. Every little thing that happens to them in these early stages, its shaping them into the adult you will see in future. Its on us to mould them into the best versions of themselves from a young age. They are indeed the future of tomorrow.